Will Sharon ever recover?

I don't know, but I'm sure the Economist is going to give me an accurate picture of what will happen if he doesn't. I GOT ONE, BITCHES!!!!!! I had grown weary and confused watching BBCworld, the same news broadcast covering Bird Flu in Turkey and Building Colapses In Nairobi, with regular notices about an upcoming biopic on Blondie wherein she announces that her pants are rubber. I used to have more faith in the BBC, now I think they are taking advantage of underdeveloped countries while marketing this watery bile as "news." Balls.
American newspapers are nonexistant in Marrakesh apparently. I found a copy of the Financial Times and occasionally the Harold Tribune. But I want to dish on Samuel Alito and internal republican scandal! I want to know about the recent FEMA fuck-ups! How will I know if no one is shoving it in my face?!
I found a way. A seventy year old expat showed me how to channel NPR on our tv satellite and today I tracked down a newsstand near school that stocks not one, but multiple copies of the afore mentioned Economist. I know it's kindof annoying to name drop it, like maybe I want you to think I'm smart or something, but come on. Alan has a subscription. How lofty can it really be? Ira Glass, here I come. I've missed you so.
Anyway, I've been reading all day. I've been recording 'early readers' for the school onto minidisc. I have this whole headphone with built-in mic set-up. It's great. I just walk around reading about Marcel and Celine, two crime solving unwed mice who live in the Louvre. It's gonna be a big hit with our twelve-year-old muslim students. Big hit.